One Question That Will Change Your Life

If there is one question that can change your life, it will probably be whether you are passionate about whatever you are doing in life.  Steve Jobs sums it up real nicely in this short video.  People who succeed are those who are passionate in what they are doing.  Why else would they be able to keep doing things at their peak level on a sustained basis?  And therein lies the secret of success.

As he also sums up nicely in this quote:

"For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something..almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important.  Remembering that you are going to dies is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose."

For the past few days, I have been asking myself what am I really passionate about in life.  And I think I have drilled it down to three things : Travelling, reading and writing.

Travelling because this is the activity that makes me feel alive.  My sense are keener and more aware of my surroundings.  I feel excited about every single sight and sound that I experience.  It is only during my travels that I truly feel alive and living.

Reading because through reading, I get to experience the viewpoints of others.  I get lost in their world.  I learn from the experience of others.  I share their joy, mistakes, pain, etc.  Things that I will never have been able to experience for myself.

Writing because it is the only creative expression of myself.  I am not talented musically or with any other kind of handicraft.  Yet, I have always viewed myself as someone who likes to create things.  And writing is something that I enjoy doing.  It allows me to consolidate my thoughts, reflect on my innermost fears and desires.  And to express them into words concretises whatever I am thinking. 

Top 5 Regrets of the Dying

Certain that many people have read this article before but guess it is always good to re-visit this article.  Tamworth-based writer and blogger Bronnie Ware shared from her experience as a palliative care nurse the various main life lessons from hours spent with the dying.  These are the top 5 regrets and it is something worth reflecting upon.

I wish:

1.  I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.  This was the most common response.

2. I hadn't worked so hard. "They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship.  All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

3.  I'd had the courage to express my feelings

4. I had stayed in touch with my friends

5.  That I had let myself be happier.


You can see that the one regret people don't have is that they should have spent more time on their work or in office.

How Bad Do You It (Success)?

Giavanni Ruffin with the inspirational speech by Eric Thomas (a.k.a the hip hop preacher).  Enjoy.





 "And when you get to the point when all you want to do is be successful as bad as you want to breath, then you will be successful." - Eric Thomas

Regrets of the Dying

I read this wonderful post of my Google Reader and decided it was worth sharing with all. Start living the life that you want to and stop having any regrets! Do let me know what you think and share with all on which regret you want to rid yourself of by commenting on this post below.

For me, it is the first. I wish I'd have the courage to live a life true to myself. I hope that I do not die with such a regret in my heart - that I feared to pursue my dreams because of other's expectations

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Bronnie Ware works in pallitative care -- with patients near the end of their life. In this post, she writes powerfully about the the top regrets that have surfaced again and again from her patients on their death beds. I've pasted the list of five below.

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

10,000 Hours To Be An Expert

Everyday I try to draw some lessons from the books that I read or the things that I experience.

I have been reading Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. In one of the chapters, it mentions that 10,000 hours is what it takes to make a person good at a particular field. That is roughly 10 years. The most gifted person or the most talented person still needs to practice 10,000 hours before they get really good.

Come to think of it, I have never really truly put in 10,000 hours into any particular field. Even during my university days, I don't think I managed to study 10,000 hours. And that perhaps explains why I am neither talented in any sport or in any musical instruments.

10,000 hours is all it takes. Of course, there needs to be some talent involve. But even with talent, you still need 10,000 hours.

Where should you devote 10,000 hours to?

Run Your Own Race

If you could turn back the hands of time, go back a year in time and meet yourself, what would you say to that person? What advice will you give him/her? What words of encouragement will you have?

IF I could travel back in time, this is probably what I will tell myself:

1. Run your own race. Don't be bothered about what others think about you. More importantly, don't be bothered about the successes you hear about other people. You are you. Treasure each day of your life. Run your own race. Don't try to compete with others.

2. Have faith. Many times, things might not go the way you want it to go. Have faith. Keep on trusting and hoping. Things will get better. Don't give up on yourself. Don't give up on God.

3. Live in the present. Stop thinking about how beautiful the past was and how you hope the future will be like. Live in the PRESENT and enjoy each moment now while you still can. Be there for your family and friends. Don't let your mind wander to things that are unknown, uncontrollable and unpredictable. Focus on what you have now and where you are right now. Stop worrying and start living.

What will you say to yourself?

Success Takes Effort

Recently, this thought has struck me deeply. Success does not come easy and it certainly takes a bit of effort. Most people spend their entire lives slogging it out before success comes their way. They spend easily 20 to 30 years of their life before reaping the fruits of their labour.

I was looking at the CV of a person I respected and was amazed at the amount of things and posts he has held. I looked at his age and wondered whether I could ever achieve such things by that age. Only time will tell and if God willing, I still have twenty years of my life to either surpass him or equal him.

Success takes effort and hard work. Often, it involves years of just working at a desk, carrying out your daily job. Just some food for thought.

Of Grenadine Syrup, Kolo Mee, Aimlessness and 1984

I went to Giant today and stared at the Grenadine Syrup that cost ten bucks per bottle. Cool. I could make my own tequila sunrise with this final ingredient. I have been eyeing it for sometime already but the thought of spending $10 for sugar water made me think twice. Alcohol by itself is already fattening and the last thing I want to do is to make myself any fatter. So I didn't buy it in the end.

Had lunch at the Sarawak Kolo Mee place. I am not sure why they call it Kolo mee. I am not sure what Kolo is supposed to mean. Anyway, the place was almost empty. The waitress greeted me warmly and I took a seat. The last time I had eaten the Kolo Mee was like more than 3 years back. Now I understood why the place was empty. A bowl of Kolo Mee which is basically like noodles, pork bits, prawns, wanton and char siew cost over $6. Together with the drink that I ordered, lunch cost me a whopping $8.55!

Nevertheless, I must say that the Kolo Mee was really tasty. I am pretty sure they drenched it in lard oil or something cos it was really super duper tasty. But I guess I won't be eating it anytime soon simply because paying six over bucks for a small bowl of noodles doesn't make economic sense to me. I know of $2.50 wanton mee that taste just as good. There is this Pontian Wanton Mee outlet at various hawker centres which are really worth it and yummy....

Feeling aimless the past few days. My wife asks me why I am not talking to her. I also do not know what to say. I just feel like I have achieved quite a bit of the goals I have set for myself in life. In the past, it was stuff like get married, get a job, travel to Europe, study abroad, have children, buy a car, get my own flat, etc etc. And I realise that I have already sort of achieved all these goals already. Whereas my peers still have the fun and joy of looking for their life partners or are looking forward to buying a car or flat, I have already sort of BEEN THERE DONE THAT. I am just feeling so aimless.

Perhaps it is time to setting more goals. Or perhaps it is about discovering what my true purpose in life is.

I have just finished reading Ninety Eighty Four by George Orwell. I thought I read it in the past but I must have been mistaken. Because I do not remember it being so saucy. My goodness. To think that I recommended the book to my wife when we first met... hahahha.. she must have thought that I must be quite "loose". I figured that I must have skimmed read it the first time or probably just jumped right to the end of the book without reading the middle parts. Anyway, 1984 is a good read. I really liked the parts about history only existing in written records and in our minds line of argument. Wicked if you ask me.

If I don't exist on written records and I don't exist in people's minds, does it mean that I do not exist at all?

On to reading my next book : One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

Millionaire Mind Intensive

Hope that you find this video useful. It shares some insights from T Harv Ecker regarding the Millionaire Mind that one should have.

What I found useful was the part where he talks about the need to get to the root of the issue. Wealth and money are just RESULTS. They are the fruits in a tree. It is however the roots that caused these fruits to appear. Likewise, when one is poor, you should look at the inside (your mindset), to remedy the problem.

Another thing he mentions about is to Quit Complaining. Complaining is what so many people do best. By complaining less, we take responsibility for our own financial destiny and stop putting the blame on others.

Brian Tracy - 10 Goal Method

A video on goal setting. Do watch and let me konw how useful you find it =)

Thoughts on My Life Purpose

As I was driving down the road today, I thought about my life purpose and what my ideal job would be like.

A man only lives once and since there must be like a thousand of different jobs, it is impossible for him to try out each and every job in the world. He thus has to make an educated guess on which is the best job for him based on his personality, skills, aptitude, etc.

I then realised how "coloured" my view of the ideal job was. I am to a certain extent the product of other people's opinions. People do not like me if I dig my nose in public. That is why I don't pick my nose in public. People's opinons do shape us in ways that we cannot imagine.

That is why we like to look up to doctors, lawyers and the like while looking down on other jobs that are deemed more suited for the common man. That is why our peers and parents secretly go "wow" if you find a girlfriend or boyfriend who belongs to any of those high paying and highly respected jobs.

However, I realised that I might be at the end of the day suited for a more normal down to earth kind of job instead of some high flying lawyer or doctor or businessman. The problem is whether I would be content with my position in life at the end of the day.

God, help me find my purpose in life

Further My Education

A friend asked me today if I was interested in furthering my education in the near future.

That was indeed a tough question to answer.

Oh well....

If money was not a concern, I would definitely go for further studies. Perhaps in a nice European country where I can get to travel around during the holidays too!

However, with masters and phds costing so much, I am not sure whether it is worth my money to pursue such courses. And besides, providing for the family comes first. It is a sacrifice I have to make.

I would LOVE to do it..especially an overseas stint. But the MONEY just does not make sense to me.

Perhaps in another year or two when things look better =)

At the mean time, I will just have to make do with my dosage of books.

Unless some generous sponsor pops up along the way and offers me a scholarship =)

If you are that sponsor sent from heaven, do let me know!

Finding My Purpose in Life

I am 28 years old this year and after much reflection, I realised that I still have not found my purpose in life.

It seems that I am drifting along like a piece of wood in a fast flowing river without the ability to steer myself to a path that I would like. The fast pace of life here also means that I hardly have the time to contemplate and think about what I truly want in life.

While friends are getting promotions, master's degrees and better jobs, I seem to be stuck in a rut that I can't dig myself out.

It seems that I lack a sense of understanding of what I want out of my life.

Is that sad?

Every year, when it comes to December, I realise that I am not closer to achieving any of my dreams simply because I have stopped pursuing my dreams for practical reasons like making a living. I am like a robot, emotionless... My childhood dreams, things that I thought I would do..are long perished from my thoughts...they seem almost impossible to achieve now where I am...I can't stop working because of the amount of financial obligations I have...thus...i also can't pursue my dreams. Midlife crisis I must say.

Brian Tracy - Organising Your Time

This is another video by Brian Tracy on Organising Your Time.

Lessons I have learnt:

1. Know who you are and what you really want from your life

2. If you only can accomplish one goal in life, which one goal will have the greatest positive impact on your life.

So what is your one goal in life?

A Picture of My Ideal Life

"The clearer your vision of what you seek, the closer you are to finding it."

Why use pictures to draw a picture of your ideal life?

Apparently, using pictures and symbols bypasses the left side of the brain (the safekeeping self) and speaks directly to your right brain (experimental self), whose job is to engineer change.

The picture of the life you really want has the power to bring about the change that you desire.

So there you have it above, the picture of my ideal life. (As you can see, I am not much of an artist)

Brian Tracy - How To Increase Your Income by 1000

Brian Tracy is a motivational speaker and self-help author. In this video, he shares some insights on how to increase your income. Happy viewing!